[Originally posted September 2007]
WARNING: THIS IS GROSS
In keeping with the “Most” theme, this is probably one of the most funny moments I have had at work. I have one other one that I’ll use on another day off when I’m bored and don’t have much to write about. You’ve been warned that this is gross, so read at your own discretion.
One of the nurses with whom I used to work was always giving the docs a hard time. Sometimes it was deserved, sometimes it wasn’t. Either way, it was all in good fun and helped make the ED a fun place to work.
When I first started working there, she used to make a lot of smart-Alec comments towards me. One night a patient came in with a discharge that was presumably a yeast infection. After examining the patient, I asked her whether the lab would do wet mounts and cultures at night. Her reply was “Why – didn’t they teach you what yeast looks like in medical school?” Everybody laughed, thinking she was quite funny. Har harr.
I went back in the lounge to get something to eat out of the refrigerator. Seeing some of the leftovers in the refrigerator, an idea was hatched. I put a small amount of cottage cheese and a little bit of pineapple juice into a specimen container and shook it up really well. Then I put the container into a bag, put a patient label on it, and put it out on the counter.
After a little while I asked the nurse whether or not she was going to send the specimen to the lab. She looked at me and said “what isthat?” I told her it was the discharge from the patient that had left. She asked why we had to send it to the lab if I already discharged the patient. I said “Fine, if you don’t want to send it to the lab, I’ll get rid of it . . .” I then opened the container and tipped it upside down over my mouth, tapped the contents into my mouth, and started chewing.
It was as if someone pulled the drain plug out of her oil pan. Her ruddy complexion turned white and she ran out of the room. Later she said that she went straight to the bathroom and vomicked.
From that night forward, we grew to be good friends.
Here’s to you, Sue!